So I’m off to a stupid week. I can feel it And I’m resigned to it as my fate and I have to take it in stride, (literally) and move forward.
Today, for example, was an exceptionally stupid day.
Because my roommate wound up working extra late today to launch the most geektacularly awesome Pipes @ Yahoo today, I had to find my own way home and coordinate *somehow* to get back into the apt without my keys as they’re attached to the car keys that are attached to the roomie, withwhom I otherwise carpooled with to work over the last few weeks.
I thought to myself – hey, no problem. I’ll take the train. Perhaps my lovely boyfriend could pick me up. He, after all has keys.
Alas, he had plans.
This is just an innocuous situation that I undersestimated. Because, you see, I had stupid on the brain.
I not only got off on a trainstop that I was unfamiliar with (thinking that I’d hop on a bus that would be more direct towards getting home) but I walked in the wrong direction. And, because, you see – I had stupid on the brain, I declined the logical steps of stopping for directions or pausing to look up things on my phone. Stupid, see? And then it started raining.
Hard.
Fiercely. And i was in a neighborhood bereft of cabs or buses. Which meant more walking. And more rain. And more walking. And more rain.
And then there was more walking and more rain.
By the time I finally caught a bus (1.4 miles in the rain) I was exhausted.
But you know – that stupid – a tenacious critter, that one.
I didn’t even know which bus I was on but sat there. Riding. Listening in on other people’s conversations about being half jewish, half mexican and picking up an Argentinian accent. Between the bus driver and a regular rider regarding the weather in the mission. On two people exchanging phone numbers after having remet each other after having met several years prior in NYC.
The bus kept on moving. Slowly forward. Slowly towards my neighborhood.
I still didn’t have keys and had a tenuous ETA on when anyone would be home to let me in.
And I smelled like a wet puppy. A slightly sweaty, very wet-haired-makeup-smeared-brown-fleece-soaked-heavy-laptop-bag-toting-puppy.
And I kept on riding.
The ETA via SMSes stated yet another hour or so before the BF could be home to let me in.
The bus came upon my intersection.
Instead of getting dropped off at an intersection closer to a restaurant where I could dry off and get food, I got dropped off near my door. Stood there for a moment. Actually closer to 5 minutes. Without moving anywhere.
And then that “Ohhhhh” firing of synapses finally kicked in and I proceeded to again take all my shit with me down four blocks to a restaurant where I treated myself to the Moriawase.
Because the logical thing to eat when one is cold and wet would be cold wet foods. < / sarcasm>
And I ate by myself for an hour. Lingering over my meal. Relishing it for it’s goodness though the logic in its selection only works with stupid on the brain.
And then I Smsed my fellow who said he’d be home in about a half hour.
I slowly wrapped up my meal, paid, and then walked back – only slightly drier.
And then waited.
An hour.
Because you see, stupid must be slightly contagious. Because BF forgot that I was without keys and was hijacked by bad bridge traffic and a multi-stop drop off by his ride.
When I’d texted him again to inquire where he was (because the wet-puppy thing was getting old) we’d figured out the miffs of stupid. Half a pack of cigarettes later, slightly dryer and a bit more shivvery, and after I punched him in the arm, I got inside. Took a hot shower. Put on my robe. And settled in to bed.
Now with all of that, you’re probably guessing as am I (if i weren’t so stupid-head today) how that experience could *possibly* be considered good for me.
Well.
a) I have been wanting to get some excercise now haven’t I? Ask and ye shall recieve.
b) Some silent (ipod dead too) personal quiet time really does let you re-sort your priorities. It’s like all that stuff in the sub sub conscious decides that with lack of any other over conscious chatter that it’ll come up top and sort itself out. Ohhhhh so *that* is why I’ve been feeling this way….
c) I’ve been inspired to write a blog post. For shame, I haven’t done that often enough in a while
d) The sushi was really quite good. And eating by oneself in a restaurant isn’t that bad an experience if you haven’t had it in a while and need to be in some quiet-headspace with only the chatter of calm quiet japanese being spoken around you.
e) I got to punch my boyfriend in the arm. He can take it. And he knows I don’t really mean it. And him running the hot shower for me makes me realize how really fortunate I am to have him in my life (totally gross i gush)..
f) I’ve had a number of little things chip at my own sense of certainty of late. Little things that have been adding up and have been on the cusp of causing me to lash out and be inappropriately agro and the good long wet walk actually helped me get a lot of that out of my system
g) At the end of the day, I do sincerely appreciate the fact that I have a warm roof over my head, being dry and healthy, beloved, and in the company of some really wonderful friends.
So there you go. A series of foolishly moronic events and yet at the end of this evening, I actually feel *better* for it.
I guess I can only say… “Thanks God. I guess I didn’t realize I needed that.”
As per the norm, God chooses not to be subtle with me because subtlty doesn’t seem to work very well. It’s more of an infrequent asskicking or whupping with a belt that I get.