The Annual Breakup Post
By Min Jung. Filed in General |
Dear 2005.
You know, I was optimistic about you.
And I’d like to believe that I gave you what I could. Of my heart, of my soul, of my mind, of my sanity. And ok, yes, we’ll admit to this, of my body too on occasion.
I threw myself into our relationship. I believed that this was going to be something spectacular.
And yes, yes, we had our moments. They were indeed pretty spectacular.
But the lows, oh the lows.
You are one seriously moody motherfucker.
So I’m just going to do what you have been a mindnumbingly annoying passive agressive fucker about.
2005, I’m dumping your ass.
Early even.
I mean, we could have stuck it out for a little longer, but why put either of us in any more pain.
I mean, I know I haven’t always been good to you but you *really* and I mean *really* didn’t have to be such a motherfucking dipshit of a cocksucking asshole over the last few weeks.
Take a nap. Call it in.
Just leave me the fuck along.
Um. Yeah,
blah blah blah, it’s not you it’s me, blah bullshit.
No seirously. It’s not me. It *IS* you.
So no hard feelings.
I’m keeping the Cds and the bottle of Scotch.
Your janky shit is on the curb waiting for garbage pickup in the rain.
See yas.
MJ
Thursday, December 29th 2005 at 11:43 am
I see the whole dating years thing in terms of decades– Man, who could forget the 80’s? She was some funky chick with all that hair spray, those big ass shoulders and parachute pants. I didn’t get no respect from her but at least I can look back and laugh…
I’m midway into the relationship of the 00’s. So far, pretty good. I’m getting to like this decade.
Friday, December 30th 2005 at 1:12 am
ah what is “janky shit”? man, do I love that phrase then the end of this dismissive missive is liiike poetry ala mode.
Friday, December 30th 2005 at 11:11 pm
i so want to do the same thing. break a leg!
Saturday, December 31st 2005 at 5:28 pm
Definition(s) of janky –> http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Janky
That’s gonna be my first new favourite slang word of 2006 … love your blog! Happy New Year!
Sunday, January 1st 2006 at 2:02 am
I’m with ya on this one, MJ – screw off, 2005!! And make sure you take all your baggage with you!!!
Friday, January 6th 2006 at 1:45 am
Hollo