God Bless America
Top reasons that I know that the terrorists have not won:
1. The Whole Foods grocery store in San Ramon has, in addition to a wide selection of imported olive oils and blended/single varietel orange blossom honeys, an extraordinarily knowledgeable staff in the seafood, meat, and cheese departments, and an assortment of organic vegetables (and low carb tofu — for those diet conscious hippies that use hemp soap), 2 — 2 fricking massage chairs. Because, damn it all to hell, it must be ridiculously exhausting and stressful going from aisle 2 where they have macrobiotic couscous to aisle 5 where they have biodegradeable tampons.
2. Showtime produces a brand new show about a suburban housewife who has to resort to selling marijuana to support her standard of living — which includes a gas guzzling SUV and a gorgeous remarbled and redecorated kitchen. Weeds. It’s their attempt at hitting the Desperate Housewives Market because apparently 80 hours a week of Doctor Phil and the Young & The Restless is not sufficient to satiate the desires of today’s contemporary family woman. Well, that and the gardner Raul.
3. While technopundits debate ad nauseum re: the benefits and superiority of various digital recording mediums and the rights of the consumer over digital mediums and people in Korea play online video games to the point of exhaustion and death, Mr. Osama Bin Ladin is still recording on VHS.
4. Mormons are getting vibrators.
5. Matt’s Mom is cooking me dinner tonight.
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