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Now, I concede that I haven’t written a real post in a while. I’ve been a little gunshy.
Bad dreams again of late, I’m afraid. I hate it.

I’ve been taking excerpts from other folks, posting PSAs, and jotting little links that hopefully provide you, dear reader, with some of the insights and interests of what’s awhirl in my life.

Sit down a bit. You may, or may not, depending on your level of indulgence, be here a bit.

I’ve been thinking of late…most animatedly this evening, with regards to my personal reconcilation related to faith and current political passions. They are not divergent.

Two things have sparked a cycle of thought of late.
#1. Obama’s compelling and “audaciously hope” filled speach
#2. DailyKos’s review and statement of Obama’s speech and this particular simple statement

He invoked God in a way that didn’t offend me.

Flashback.

I don’t claim to be a good Christian and I am a very bad Catholic. And that’s fine because as far as I’ve seen, God’s love doesn’t work on meritocracy.

Two years ago I received a comment in response to one of my posts challenging me on how I can call myself a Christian while being a fag hag.

I responded in length, but the snapshot version is based on two primary tenements which I still hold to today.

#1. Nothing exists unless God wills it exist. God doesn’t make mistakes. Ergo the notion that a God exists that loves a child but could possibly *renig* on that love because that child eventually grows up and identifies themself as homosexual is — well — ludicrous.

#2. Anyone who presumes to judge another in the name of God has an extraordinary amount of arogance to
assume that they have the right to spread hate and exclusionism on behalf of anyone’s name.

Take with a grain of salt that I recognize that I am a spiritual person without being particularly religious. And that I have encountered in my lifetime people that are religious without being spiritual. I have had the fortune of encountering those graced with the amazing capacity of faith and discipline to be both. I’ve also had the fuck annoyed out of me by encountering indivuals bereft of both spirituality and concept or respect of religion.

Living in Sf I’ve grown accustomed to the general vibe that it is extraordinarily counter culture to adhere to traditional faith of any sort of judeo christian norm.

I have issues with our current president. That he invokes that name of God, the same God that I believe in, and uses that to manipulate an emotional response to hasten into a war with imperfect information conflicts me and shames me. That religion should be used as an excuse to demonize another, exclude and divide a nation, or deny two people that love each other the opportunity to be recognized and cherished within their community — infuriates me on a visceral level that I’m unable to articulate.

There are many that I’ve encountered (both in politics and in day to day life) that have made me feel embarrassed for my faith. Those that take religion as an excuse to abuse or to divide, those that use it to judge and belittle, and most of all, to encourage hate in the name of a God who has intended and hoped for nothing more than for us to love one another. Too often have we heard over the last two years, the invokation of God in a way that *does* offend, more often than not. It batters our sensibilities into an identify of the Christian Right and Republican as being stodgy, myopic, stubborn, unyeilding, and very often times very stupid. That individuals are Christian or Republican because they are too idiotic to make their own decisions and need conformity and control and order in their lives.

Faith simply cannot thrive without emotional freedom.
And choice is the profound articulation of free will — which makes us human.

Now, it is naive to believe that a nation can exist where religion and government remain completely sterile and seperate. It’s not human nature. Consider the history of a man in Jerusalem getting nailed to a big stick because an insecure king thought it was fucked up that he should be rumored to be a leader of the Jews. Not to mention the nuances of ardent devotion, study, and faith that inspires folks to tow trucks with their gonads or go to war in the mideast. One way or another, it’s a nut yanking, isn’t it?

Anyways, back to some half assed attempt at a point.

I think that Obama is the first politician that I’ve come across in a very long time that has portrayed a convincing representation of the intelligence, dignity, potential, optimism, and inclusionary sensibilities that makes me feel proud as both an American and as a Christian.

As a progressive Christian, I’d like to see more peeps representing me and my community, my city, my state, and my country that embody his committment and ideals. His speech makes me want to be a better person and a better American.

We all start somewhere.

Ernie, I’m sure, will have a field day with this.

NEWS FROM ICN®
The Dating Game meets Survivor… Elimidate meets Fear Factor… welcome to Object of Desire! In this series of bizarre challenges and situations, Asian American young people compete to win an all-expenses-paid date with their “object of desire.” While the contestants duke it out in humorous and sometimes humiliating competitions, the date waits to see who survives, all the while hoping it will be the contestant he or she desires the most!

On In America, we follow the dramatic story of the political “coming of age” of the Asian-American community in the Silicon Valley town of Cupertino, California. From public schools to community activities and local politics, the political clout of Asian Americans is growing. In America tells the story of why and how these Asian-Americans have become so politically prominent and how they are exercising their new political power.

These original programs will air on International Channel beginning in September.

c/o International Channel Networks

American Olympians may be strong, athletic, driven and competitive, but diversity also describes the 2004 U. S. Olympic Team. Some ethnic backgrounds represented include Japanese, South African, Israeli, Chinese, Hungarian and German, just to name a few. This August, be on the lookout for these promising U.S. Olympic athletes:

Kevin Han — Badminton
Chinese immigrant whose first job in the United States was delivering Chinese food for a restaurant
One of the top badminton players in the world; holds the highest rank for an American in the sport

Kimiko Soldati — Diving
Comes from Japanese ancestry; father was born in a U.S. internment camp
Tried out diving after suffering a serious injury from gymnastics in high school

Mohini Bhardwaj — Gymnastics
Father is from India and mother is from Russia, but they met in Canada
Favorite event is vault; won the 2001 national vault title

Speech Text: Barack Obama

Borrowed from http://www.command-post.org

From the DNCC via email, the full text of Barack Obama’s convention speech:

On behalf of the great state of Illinois, crossroads of a nation, land of Lincoln, let me express my deep gratitude for the privilege of addressing this convention. Tonight is a particular honor for me because, let’s face it, my presence on this stage is pretty unlikely. My father was a foreign student, born and raised in a small village in Kenya. He grew up herding goats, went to school in a tin-roof shack. His father, my grandfather, was a cook, a domestic servant.

But my grandfather had larger dreams for his son. Through hard work and perseverance my father got a scholarship to study in a magical place; America which stood as a beacon of freedom and opportunity to so many who had come before. While studying here, my father met my mother. She was born in a town on the other side of the world, in Kansas. Her father worked on oil rigs and farms through most of the Depression. The day after Pearl Harbor he signed up for duty, joined Patton’s army and marched across Europe. Back home, my grandmother raised their baby and went to work on a bomber assembly line. After the war, they studied on the GI Bill, bought a house through FHA, and moved west in search of opportunity.

And they, too, had big dreams for their daughter, a common dream, born of two continents. My parents shared not only an improbable love; they shared an abiding faith in the possibilities of this nation. They would give me an African name, Barack, or “blessed,” believing that in a tolerant America your name is no barrier to success. They imagined me going to the best schools in the land, even though they weren’t rich, because in a generous America you don’t have to be rich to achieve your potential. They are both passed away now. Yet, I know that, on this night, they look down on me with pride.

I stand here today, grateful for the diversity of my heritage, aware that my parents’ dreams live on in my precious daughters. I stand here knowing that my story is part of the larger American story, that I owe a debt to all of those who came before me, and that, in no other country on earth, is my story even possible. Tonight, we gather to affirm the greatness of our nation, not because of the height of our skyscrapers, or the power of our military, or the size of our economy. Our pride is based on a very simple premise, summed up in a declaration made over two hundred years ago, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal. That they are endowed by their Creator with certain inalienable rights. That among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”

That is the true genius of America, a faith in the simple dreams of its people, the insistence on small miracles. That we can tuck in our children at night and know they are fed and clothed and safe from harm. That we can say what we think, write what we think, without hearing a sudden knock on the door. That we can have an idea and start our own business without paying a bribe or hiring somebody’s son. That we can participate in the political process without fear of retribution, and that our votes will be counted — or at least, most of the time.

This year, in this election, we are called to reaffirm our values and commitments, to hold them against a hard reality and see how we are measuring up, to the legacy of our forbearers, and the promise of future generations. And fellow Americans — Democrats, Republicans, Independents — I say to you tonight: we have more work to do. More to do for the workers I met in Galesburg, Illinois, who are losing their union jobs at the Maytag plant that’s moving to Mexico, and now are having to compete with their own children for jobs that pay seven bucks an hour. More to do for the father I met who was losing his job and choking back tears, wondering how he would pay $4,500 a month for the drugs his son needs without the health benefits he counted on. More to do for the young woman in East St. Louis, and thousands more like her, who has the grades, has the drive, has the will, but doesn’t have the money to go to college.

Don’t get me wrong. The people I meet in small towns and big cities, in diners and office parks, they don’t expect government to solve all their problems. They know they have to work hard to get ahead and they want to. Go into the collar counties around Chicago, and people will tell you they don’t want their tax money wasted by a welfare agency or the Pentagon. Go into any inner city neighborhood, and folks will tell you that government alone can’t teach kids to learn. They know that parents have to parent, that children can’t achieve unless we raise their expectations and turn off the television sets and eradicate the slander that says a black youth with a book is acting white. No, people don’t expect government to solve all their problems. But they sense, deep in their bones, that with just a change in priorities, we can make sure that every child in America has a decent shot at life, and that the doors of opportunity remain open to all. They know we can do better. And they want that choice.

In this election, we offer that choice. Our party has chosen a man to lead us who embodies the best this country has to offer. That man is John Kerry. John Kerry understands the ideals of community, faith, and sacrifice, because they’ve defined his life. From his heroic service in Vietnam to his years as prosecutor and lieutenant governor, through two decades in the United States Senate, he has devoted himself to this country. Again and again, we’ve seen him make tough choices when easier ones were available. His values and his record affirm what is best in us.

John Kerry believes in an America where hard work is rewarded. So instead of offering tax breaks to companies shipping jobs overseas, he’ll offer them to companies creating jobs here at home. John Kerry believes in an America where all Americans can afford the same health coverage our politicians in Washington have for themselves. John Kerry believes in energy independence, so we aren’t held hostage to the profits of oil companies or the sabotage of foreign oil fields. John Kerry believes in the constitutional freedoms that have made our country the envy of the world, and he will never sacrifice our basic liberties nor use faith as a wedge to divide us. And John Kerry believes that in a dangerous world, war must be an option, but it should never be the first option.

A while back, I met a young man named Shamus at the VFW Hall in East Moline, Illinois. He was a good-looking kid, six-two or six-three, clear eyed, with an easy smile. He told me he’d joined the Marines and was heading to Iraq the following week. As I listened to him explain why he’d enlisted, his absolute faith in our country and its leaders, his devotion to duty and service, I thought this young man was all any of us might hope for in a child. But then I asked myself: Are we serving Shamus as well as he was serving us? I thought of more than 900 service men and women, sons and daughters, husbands and wives, friends and neighbors, who will not be returning to their hometowns. I thought of families I had met who were struggling to get by without a loved one’s full income, or whose loved ones had returned with a limb missing or with nerves shattered, but who still lacked long-term health benefits because they were reservists. When we send our young men and women into harm’s way, we have a solemn obligation not to fudge the numbers or shade the truth about why they’re going, to care for their families while they’re gone, to tend to the soldiers upon their return, and to never ever go to war without enough troops to win the war, secure the peace, and earn the respect of the world.

Now let me be clear. We have real enemies in the world. These enemies must be found. They must be pursued and they must be defeated. John Kerry knows this. And just as Lieutenant Kerry did not hesitate to risk his life to protect the men who served with him in Vietnam, President Kerry will not hesitate one moment to use our military might to keep America safe and secure. John Kerry believes in America. And he knows it’s not enough for just some of us to prosper. For alongside our famous individualism, there’s another ingredient in the American saga.

A belief that we are connected as one people. If there’s a child on the south side of Chicago who can’t read, that matters to me, even if it’s not my child. If there’s a senior citizen somewhere who can’t pay for her prescription and has to choose between medicine and the rent, that makes my life poorer, even if it’s not my grandmother. If there’s an Arab American family being rounded up without benefit of an attorney or due process, that threatens my civil liberties. It’s that fundamental belief — I am my brother’s keeper, I am my sisters’ keeper — that makes this country work. It’s what allows us to pursue our individual dreams, yet still come together as a single American family. “E pluribus unum.” Out of many, one.

Yet even as we speak, there are those who are preparing to divide us, the spin masters and negative ad peddlers who embrace the politics of anything goes. Well, I say to them tonight, there’s not a liberal America and a conservative America — there’s the United States of America. There’s not a black America and white America and Latino America and Asian America; there’s the United States of America. The pundits like to slice-and-dice our country into Red States and Blue States; Red States for Republicans, Blue States for Democrats. But I’ve got news for them, too. We worship an awesome God in the Blue States, and we don’t like federal agents poking around our libraries in the Red States. We coach Little League in the Blue States and have gay friends in the Red States. There are patriots who opposed the war in Iraq and patriots who supported it. We are one people, all of us pledging allegiance to the stars and stripes, all of us defending the United States of America.

In the end, that’s what this election is about. Do we participate in a politics of cynicism or a politics of hope? John Kerry calls on us to hope. John Edwards calls on us to hope. I’m not talking about blind optimism here — the almost willful ignorance that thinks unemployment will go away if we just don’t talk about it, or the health care crisis will solve itself if we just ignore it. No, I’m talking about something more substantial. It’s the hope of slaves sitting around a fire singing freedom songs; the hope of immigrants setting out for distant shores; the hope of a young naval lieutenant bravely patrolling the Mekong Delta; the hope of a millworker’s son who dares to defy the odds; the hope of a skinny kid with a funny name who believes that America has a place for him, too. The audacity of hope!

In the end, that is God’s greatest gift to us, the bedrock of this nation; the belief in things not seen; the belief that there are better days ahead. I believe we can give our middle class relief and provide working families with a road to opportunity. I believe we can provide jobs to the jobless, homes to the homeless, and reclaim young people in cities across America from violence and despair. I believe that as we stand on the crossroads of history, we can make the right choices, and meet the challenges that face us. America!

Tonight, if you feel the same energy I do, the same urgency I do, the same passion I do, the same hopefulness I do — if we do what we must do, then I have no doubt that all across the country, from Florida to Oregon, from Washington to Maine, the people will rise up in November, and John Kerry will be sworn in as president, and John Edwards will be sworn in as vice president, and this country will reclaim its promise, and out of this long political darkness a brighter day will come. Thank you and God bless you.

KB: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK FUCK PANCAKES!
Moi: What up, g? Sipping too much of the haterade?
KB: FUCK FUCK FUCKITY LAWN GNOMES FUCK FUCK!
Moi: No, seriously. What up?
KB: FUCKING WEDDING INVITATION WHERE MY EX WILL BE THERE!
Moi: So? You look hot. No big deal. Besides, it’s been *forever*. Right?
KB: FUCK. BUT I GOTTA SIT AT THE SINGLES TABLE!
Moi: And so? Isn’t that your usual traulling grounds?
KB: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK — YOU DON’T GET IT! J***’s GOING TO BE THERE!
Moi: Oh. Motherfucking. Shit.

KB: …

Moi: Uh…Did he ever get that tattoo of your name removed?

Broken links re: updates on advanced services.
Search out for most of yesterday morning.
And error msgs with trying to send my email.

Google peeps: Please for the love of gawd, come down from your coke high and your IPO giddiness and fix shit.

Beau Bonneau Casting is seeking:

FULL Filipino Babies between 2 and 6 months of age and
FULL Filipino Grandmothers that must be 50 years of age and over

to be in a PG&E Print Ad. If selected, they must be available either
August 18 or 19. They will be needed for 2 or 3 hours that day and will be
paid $300. Please email a photo of the child or grandmother to
info@christianpeacock.com by Monday August 2.

Make sure you include your
contact telephone numbers. You will be notified ONLY if you or the child
has been selected. BOTH ROLES MUST BE OF FULL FILIPINO DECENT.
If you know of anyone who fits this type, please forward this email to
them.

Can I just say that I love Mo Rocca!

BOOYAH.

Way to have a sense of humor and joy with regards to smart politics.

“There are 90 Kennedys here … here to listen to Ted Kennedy speak today. I’m currently walking through the Samoan Delegation right now. That means that there are 15 times as many Kennedy’s as there are Samoans.”

MoveOn.org is co-sponsoring an album featuring powerful and political songs — most of them unreleased until now — from some of the best artists around. It’s called the “Future Soundtrack for America.”

For a donation to MoveOn PAC of $25 or more, we’ll make sure you get the album before it hits the record stores. These donations will make a real impact, allowing the PAC to run ads that counter the Bush campaign’s negative attacks on Kerry and present a vision for how our country ought to be.

You can order a copy of the “Future Soundtrack for America” online right now at:
https://www.moveonpac.org/future/index.html?id=3153-4422185-harFe8mRy9ufEP6zfIcRuw

The album features a pretty amazing line up of artists: Blink-182, Bright Eyes, David Byrne, Laura Cantrell, Clem Snide, Death Cab for Cutie, Mike Doughty, The Flaming Lips, Fountains of Wayne, Jimmy Eat World, Ben Kweller, The Long Winters, Nada Surf, OK Go, Old 97’s, R.E.M., Sleater-Kinney, They Might Be Giants, Tom Waits, will.i.am of The Black Eyed Peas, and the Yeah Yeah Yeahs are all featured. In addition, the family of Elliott Smith contributed a mix of “A Distorted Reality Is Now A Necessity To Be Free,” a song from Smith’s as-yet-unreleased last record, and the first release of new material since his death in late 2003.

Together, the songs present a passionate rallying cry for all of us to take our country back. Mike Doughty’s song “Move On” hones in on the passion that drives all of our activism, singing “I love my country so much, like an exasperating friend.” Tom Waits’ contribution is a heartbreaking song about a letter home from a soldier in Iraq. R.E.M. takes on Bush and the war in Iraq, and They Might Be Giants (whose John Flansburgh pulled the project together) revisit a campaign song from the Presidential campaign of 1840.

The album is a joint project between MoveOn.org and the good folks at Music for America and Barsuk Records. MoveOn PAC has purchased a large quantity of CDs from Barsuk Records to give away to PAC contributors. You can order the album right now and help run ads to defeat Bush at:

https://www.moveonpac.org/future/index.html?id=3153-4422185-harFe8mRy9ufEP6zfIcRuw

So Google puts out some details on it’s IPO, promptly has a whole bunch of giddy drunk developers spill champaign on their servers, make-out with each other under a YahooGuy Pinata, knock over the power-supplys for their office, blast TMBG throughout the campus and start running naked in the streets in delight.
And then … like… totaly ignores the SEC thingie.

And then Google goes down for a bit.

Nice.

Ok, maybe that didn’t happen exactly like that…but you could, like totally, see that. Right?

Forwarded over from the sexy goodness that is Manja.org

http://manja.org/haroldandkumar/

July 24, 2004

Dear Friends, Fans, Haters, Players, and True Money Makers,
Hey! This is Kal Penn (aka Kalpen Modi) and John Cho
writing to encourage you to go see our upcoming comedy from New Line Cinema, “Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle,” opening nationwide on July 30th.

This film marks the first time a major studio is releasing a project with two Asian American males as the leads.

We don’t have stereotypical accents, we don’t passively tread through the story, we’re not asexual or hypersexual, there are no martial arts scenes, one-dimensional cab driver segments.

We play a couple of all-American guys who happen to be of Indian and Korean descent. Our characters (Harold and Kumar) are post- collegiate buddies who get the munchies and end up going on the adventure of their lives as they set out to satisfy a spontaneous craving for White Castle burgers. Ebert and Roeper just gave our movie “Two Thumbs Up”! We hope you will too. Read on.

The opening weekend for any film is extremely important.
Studio executives (the people who make big decisions about movies) track the numbers from that first weekend’s ticket sales and make all kinds of decisions based on that data.
They decide if they will add more screens to show a film, if they will spend more money in promoting it, if they will start investing in a sequel… but most importantly, they
decide if elements of the film work and whether they should do it again.

In our case, that means they will be asking, “Will a strong script and story succeed or fail with 2 Asian American guys in non-stereotypical roles?”. We personally think it will
succeed, but we need your help! This film is our chance to prove that realistic, nonstereotypical depictions can make an audience have a blast, and take in enough money to make this happen in the future.

By buying a ticket to “Harold and Kumar go to White Castle”, you aren’t just gonna get to see a really funny movie with two dudes who look like you. Nope. You’re also going to be
saying to media outlets, “I support accurate representation of Asian Americans and would like to see more.” You have the power to change things simply by buying a ticket to a film that we believe you’ll have fun watching anyway!

Please go to the theaters on the weekend of July 30th, and watch “Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle”. We look at this awesome opportunity like we do voting in an election. Every movie ticket someone buys is a VOTE, and the cool part is, you’re allowed to vote as many times as you want.

With your support of the film, we will show decision-makers in Hollywood that supporting movies like these is not only the right thing to do, but is also good business. We’ll also show YOU what it’s like to ride a cheetah, hang glide off a cliff, pick
up a hitchhiking Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie Howser), tell off a bunch of ignorant punks, get love interests, and sing Wilson Phillips at the top of our lungs.

So just hold on for one more… week, and check out the website at www.HaroldandKumar.com. This film opens the weekend of July 30th! Send this email to all of your friends. Throw parties. Order food. Make a night (or weekend) out of
it and go see “Harold and Kumar go to White Castle”!

This is a landmark opportunity for the Asian American community, and we are proud to be the faces involved. With your support and the success of this film, we hope that it’s only the beginning of many more Asian Americans on screen…

Enjoy the movie,

Kal Penn and John Cho
“Kumar” and “Harold”

New Line Cinema’s “Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle”

http://www.haroldandkumar.com

Years ago
I scratched out some words
Tumbling clumsy like I do
After too much champaign
which is any champaign
such a kick from champaign
In,The.Ass.
which after so much champaign
used to be significantly smaller
after a boy that I definitely didn’t know well.

And he wrote me cards that lured me
like potatochips to my pms.
To no one’s surprise,
I was drawn in by need and madness
And then I regained my sanity
after about 6 days of misery,
I felt thinner.

Which seems ironic and silly
But if you laugh it’s because you know that it’s true.
And in sanity, I realized
that the boy was unworthy
of anything more than fritopie heartburn
which should never be confused
or mistaken for real heartbreak.

Oh but for 6 maddening days
I glowed hot and high like a pyre
Set before some viking bitch
who’d got drunk and fucked and sent out to sea.
which really has nothing in particular to do with me.
Otherthan to say that Peaches isn’t right
About trying to “Fuck the Pain Away”
Because in the end, have you met anyone for which that really really really worked?

To which, finding this long lost valentines card
which states oh, so charming
from you, old what’shisname-that-bears-embaressment-in-the-mentioning

“Common logic would tell you that a pig is no match for a tiger…
but what if the pig is very clever and has flowers?”

Makes me wonder if there’s more than good taste
to explain why I’m so ridiculously fond of bacon?

eructation \ih-ruhk-TAY-shuhn\, noun:
The act of belching; a belch.

Ignatius belched, the gassy eructations echoing between the walls of the alley.
–John Kennedy Toole, A Confederacy of Dunces

The explosion, at this distance, sounds like a faint, feeble eructation.
–Peter Conrad, “Bangs to whimpers,” The Observer, March 7, 2004

Oddly enough, whenever I think about burping, I think about Scott and how he’s got performance anxiety about burping in public. Funny for a man going on tour for his singing shtuff.

Here’s the idea (all dates excruciatingly tentative):

11/6 – Olympia WA
11/7 – Portland OR
11/8 – Sacramento/Davis CA
11/9 – San Francisco CA
11/?? – Los Angeles CA

Me with a lukewarm diet coke? Total.Fucking.Rockstar.

Sturdy suggests that the main function of the male’s response is “to advertise that ’she’s with me.’”

I wonder how the Zebra Finch responds in recognizing its mate when the Giants are on TV.

I bet it sucks.