You’re Kidding Me.
In the latest installment of conversations with the kissing bandit.
KB: How you holding up, lovey?
Moi: Grand.
KB: Is that “Grand” as in “It was the biggest dick I’ve ever seen and it’s mine all mine” type of “Grand” or is it “Grand” as in “The canyon is a big fucking hole in the ground and I just want to throw myself down it” type of “Grand.”
Moi: Feh.
KB: Go buy yourself a new lipstick.
Moi: What are you trying to say?
KB: It’s $3.50 worth of love that always makes you feel good and it’s less fattening than chocolate.
Moi: *Now* what are you trying to say?
KB: Feh (wink)
Moi: Bitch.
KB: And that’s why you love me.
Moi: So what’s the word in your world?
KB: Revenge is sweet.
Moi: What? The boy thing? You broke up?
KB: No. I just got back at him for something stupid that he did the other night.
Moi: What he do?
KB: He forgot to kiss me goodbye the other morning.
Moi: And that’s a crime?
KB: Enough of one in my book.
Moi: Ok then, so what was the punishment then?
KB: I farted on him.
Moi: GROSS!
KB: He was asleep. I’m sure he didn’t even notice.
Moi: WHAT?!
KB: Yeah, while we were all snuggled up and spooning, I let one loose on his leg.
Moi: Did he wake up?
KB: No.
Moi:Did he notice it?
KB: No.
Moi: I can’t believe you did that.
KB: It felt *great*.
Moi: You are one fricking twisted chick.
KB: Look. I get back at him. I feel better. It’s like I get to punch him without feeling guilty about it afterwards.
Moi: Sure thing Ms manbeater. Man eater. Both. Whatever.
KB: Well, he’s only going to last through the next month or so anyways.
Moi: You said that last month.
KB: I know.
Moi: (*wink*)
KB: (*squeal of delight*) (*pooty fart*)
Moi: PUAH HA HA HAHA
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